A Purple Limo Peels Out at a Stop Light

A Purple Limo Peels Out at a Stop Light A Purple Limo Peels Out at a Stop Light

I see some strange stuff when I’m out and about. Maybe I’m just more observant than the regular person, but…gosh, some of the stuff I see and observations I make…true life is stranger than fiction, at least that’s what they say, whoever they is.

Saturday, I was shopping. I was driving down one of the main roads in town when I see a purple limo. It has a custom paint job. There are little bolts of lightning painted on the back. The windows are tinted, of course. It’s in the lane to the left of me at a stop light. The light is red. The light turns red and that limo spun tires. There was a black patch of tire rubber a hundred feet long on the road, no joke. I could smell burnt tires in the air.

Is this normal? I mean, seriously, limos although not a common sight, aren’t exactly that out of the ordinary, but purple limos with custom paint jobs? Purple limos with custom paint jobs peeling out at a stoplight?

Do other people ignore this stuff?

On that very same day, I believe, I saw a guy riding a motorcycle, but he wasn’t sitting upright, he was lying on his belly and his feet were extended out behind him into the air. He didn’t really look distressed so I guess he meant to do it.

I also make interesting observations when I’m out. For instance, at Hobby Lobby, there’s a sign that says not to take merchandise into the bathroom. I know it’s to prevent shoplifting, but I want to believe that they’ve had problems with people crafting in the bathrooms.

“Gosh Darnit!! Someone knitted the stall doors shut again!!”

“Another hot-glued toilet paper sculpture?!”

“Who carved up our soap?!”

“Really?! A silk flower archway over each stall?!”

“When will they ever learn? Crafting and bathrooms don’t mix…”

The other day, as I was waiting to meet up with a friend, I went to Joann’s. There were frogs doing yoga there! Seriously, why are the frogs doing yoga? Why do frogs need to do yoga? They’re already pretty flexible as it is without doing yoga. Of all the things I would want in my house, apparently, I need frogs doing yoga. There was also a cat doing yoga. Look, cats are acrobatic enough as it is, they don’t need to be doing yoga.

Look, the world is full of all kinds of crazy stuff, even if you’re just going shopping.

Now keep your darn crafts out of the bathroom. Shame on you guys, making Hobby Lobby put up a sign to keep merchandise out of the bathroom. Just can’t wait to craft until you get home, can you? You probably take your knitting needles and go knit out back behind Hobby Lobby’s dumpster right after you get out of the store, just to get your crafting kick as soon as possible.

Because It’s True

Because It's TrueBecause It’s True

This is my new T-shirt and you know why I bought it? I bought it because I like Labyrinth, but also because it’s true. I am the babe with the power. I’m awesome.

This past week things have picked up for me. I ran four days this past week, which is quite good since I haven’t run in some time. I started again last week. It’s been relaxing and energizing.

This past week held a few other perks. I was actually able to go out with friends several times. I had gluten-free sesame chicken. I had Mexican food. I had a good salad. I had lots of laughs. It’s good to be around other people. I miss other people when I can’t be around them.

I had planned to hang out with a friend on Saturday, but that fell through, no matter, I went and got a massage and went shopping. I ended up with a couple of dresses, a new eye mask for sleeping, some cocoa chai latte mix, and a hazelnut chocolate bar. I’ve also been really into lemon flavored Greek yogurt and granola. It’s the stuff. It’s delicious. Lemon flavored dairy products may not sound awesome, but they totally are.

I’ve been working a lot at my job. This past week there was a bad storm which caused a power outage where I work. Can’t do a whole lot in technology when the power goes out. Well, I was the babe with the power, or lack of it, that day at work. 😉

I spent the week being awesome. My t-shirt is true. I am the babe with the power and maybe next week I’ll be the babe with the power as well.

A Lot of Nothing then Something

A Lot of NothingA Lot of Nothing then Something

This weekend I did a lot of nothing. That makes at least two weekends in a row that I’ve done a lot of nothing. I just haven’t had any desire. I couldn’t even tell you what I did the past couple of weekends. What did I do? Where did I go? Who knows? It’s not that I blacked the entire thing out, it’s just that there was nothing exciting to report.

Towards the end of last week, things changed. I got some energy out of nowhere. I was like, “I want to run,” so I did, not like Forrest Gump kind of running, but I got on the treadmill and I ran. It’s been a long while since I’ve ran.

That weekend, I fought the cat for guacamole at one point. She loves guacamole. I have no idea why and I’ve never met a cat that likes guacamole before.

Oh, and I also went to Bath and Body Works and sniffed all the candles. When one goes to Bath and Body Works, one has to sniff all the candles.

Monday came around and I ran some more. It may not be much, but I did things, things that I haven’t been doing for a long time. Maybe this means things are evening out for me.

Who knows what I’ll do next week, maybe I’ll jump out of a plane…probably not that.

Sick, Single, and Stuck at Home on Valentine’s Day

Sick, Single, and Stuck at Home on Valentine's DaySick, Single, and Stuck at Home on Valentine’s Day

Maybe my heart is icy like this daffodil or maybe I just ran into some bad luck.

I was alone on Valentine’s Day, and sick, and also, stuck at home. That morning, I woke up, felt like junk, then proceeded to throw up. Awesome. I felt absolutely awful. My throat burned all day long. I went back to bed.

I had originally planned to go out shopping on Valentine’s Day, even though I was alone, because stores have some good sales on Valentine’s Day and at least if I had to spend the day alone, I could catch some retail therapy, well, that didn’t happen. The only place I managed to go was the grocery store around the corner to buy myself some orange juice, sprite, and soup. I also got popsicles. My throat still hurt and they helped.

That night, it iced a bit, as you can see from my picture of the sad little daffodil in the ice.

To some of you, it may have been a big deal to be alone on Valentine’s Day, but it honestly wasn’t that big of a deal to me. I was married for some odd years and my Valentine’s Days almost always sucked. Someone hated Valentine’s Day. That someone was not me.

I don’t like the idea of overindulgence on Valentine’s Day. I don’t need big fancy dinners or tons of roses or a fifty-pound box of chocolates. It’s just nice to spend a little quality time with the person who you love and honestly, presents don’t hurt, but it doesn’t have to be anything fancy. Has anybody ever heard of a nice hand-written note, some nice flowers, don’t have to be roses, and some good chocolate? Seriously, nothing fancy. No fancy diamonds. No fancy expensive dinners. Just take a day to celebrate your love, or whatever you want to call it. Watch a movie on the couch and drink sparkling apple cider for crying out loud. It’s not rocket science.

All-in-all, I would rather spend Valentine’s Day alone and sick than know that I had someone who could be celebrating with me, but they chose not to care about it or my feelings.

I wouldn’t say this has been my best Valentine’s Day in the past several years, but it’s probably close.

Sometimes the Best Thing is the Hardest Thing

Sometimes the Best Thing is the Hardest ThingSometimes the Best Thing is the Hardest Thing

No one ever said life would be easy, no one. If they did, they were big fat, liar, liar pants on fires–peoples, or whatever. Life isn’t easy. It’s not supposed to be easy. It’s life. If life was easy, we’d call it sleeping or something, but not life. Heck, even sleeping can be difficult.

I’ve had a rough year. There are times when I’ve thought, “If only I didn’t have to do XYZ, my life would be easier.” Now, this sentiment may or may not be true. I don’t really know because I am doing XYZ. This could always be a case of “the grass is greener” and me not doing XYZ would really be horrible. I just don’t know.

Part of life, and being human, is not knowing how exactly two different choices would have played out in your life. You can’t pick everything. You have to pick one thing, possibly two, or three, depending on the situation, but you can’t pick everything. You just can’t know what those other choices might have been. You just can’t know where they might have taken you.

To be completely honest, there have been moments of weakness when I have been going through my divorce that I’ve thought, “Wouldn’t it all just be so much easier if I wasn’t getting divorced?” Granted, these were moments of extreme weakness on my part. I was depressed and felt as if I was at the bottom of a pit because all these bad things kept happening to me and I was lonely.

I had to be my own voice of reason at those points. If things really were the other way around, I would be in a crappy position. I would not be happy. It would not be mentally good for me. It wouldn’t be emotionally good for me. It wouldn’t be financially good for me. None of it would be good for me. The only real advantage I would have would be not being alone, part of the time. I was alone, a lot, in my marriage. I would just be depressed all over again because I was married and hardly ever spent time with my spouse, plus everything else that was going on.

This past year has been one of the most difficult years of my entire life, but difficult doesn’t necessarily mean wrong. Difficult does not equate to bad. It may suck, but sometimes the most difficult choice you could make in a decision is the right choice. It may hurt. It may make you cry. It may make you depressed, but in the end, when that choice has been carried out, you’re better off. You’ve been able to grow as a person and hopefully make yourself better in some way.

Those difficult choices do suck though. Deep down, you may know that it’s right for you to make that choice, but it still hurts and it still stings. That choice can make you feel a full range of doubt despite the fact that you know that choice is right for you. There will be things thrown into your way to muddle up your choice. Those things make it more difficult to keep on with your difficult choice.

Maybe it’s money. Maybe it’s loneliness. Maybe it’s pizza, could be? We all have our weaknesses. There is some little monkey wrench that will get into your plans and will nag at you and make you think that perhaps this difficult choice is the wrong choice, but at the same time, there’s always your personal reassurance that you’re making a good choice.

We can doubt ourselves. We do doubt ourselves, a lot.

We get used to a certain level of comfort and ease in our lives. We get up. We go to work. We come home. We rinse and repeat. When you make a difficult decision, you get up, you go to work, or not, you have to go to a doctor’s office after work, or maybe a lawyer’s office, maybe you don’t go home, maybe you go somewhere else, maybe you have to visit someone out-of-state, maybe you go to a therapist after work, maybe you don’t even have a job, maybe you can’t sleep.

We don’t want to interrupt our “normal” life with difficult choices, but sometimes, we have to. As much as it pains us and inconveniences us to make these decisions, they sometimes just have to be made.

As much as it may suck, just rip the bandage off.

I Watched a Train

trainI Watched a Train

The Other day I was driving to another side of town and as I was nearing a rail-road crossing, the bells came on and the bars lowered across the road. I watched as a train, with one other engine and twenty-two cars of various types passed by on the road. I mused over how annoying it must be to honk the train whistle at every rail-road crossing. The train was a short one and soon I was able to go on my way.

Nothing is remarkable about this train; it wasn’t even that long. What was remarkable to me is that this was the first train I’ve watched just pass by in years and years.

The area I live in, has a lot of trains. You would have thought that I would have seen a lot of them passing by. I occasionally hear them, even from my house which isn’t really close to tracks, but I haven’t seen them. Why? Well, part of the reason is that I’m just never in the right place at the right time. It’s not like trains are crossing my path all the time. I that were the case, it would be a bit odd.

Part of the reason is that someone, not me, didn’t like to wait for trains and someone always found a way around, on different roads, instead of just waiting for the train to pass.

Here’s the thing–I like trains. I always have. I used to watch Shining Time Station when I was a kid. I had train sets, that I played with, and, yes, I’m totally a girl. I used to love watching the trains pass when I was a kid. I like watching trains pass and counting all the cars. I’ve been on trains, several times. I thought train conductors were neat. The first house I lived in when I moved to Georgia was an old train depot and there used to be train tracks running by the house. They took them up; I remember. Let’s just say I like trains and leave it at that.

Maybe I’m childish for wanting to watch a train pass by and count all the cars, but, you know what, if I can’t have some childish enjoyment out of a day-to-day occurrence like this, then shoot me. If a train happens to cross my path, and I’m not stalled in the middle of the tracks, gosh darnit, I want to enjoy it. Let me be. Let me watch the train and count the cars.

There are Good Times and Then There are Bad Times

There's Good Times and Then There's Bad TimesThere are Good Times and Then There are Bad Times

There are large portions of my life that I don’t want to remember. I don’t want to think about them at all. There are times I just want to forget and write off as a time of nothingness in my life. How am I supposed to account for all this time of nothing? Maybe I was just living day-to-day and nothing ever happened, but something did happen. The reason I don’t want to remember those times is that they were not good.

I don’t remember a lot of my childhood. It was rough for me. I had an undiagnosed endocrine disorder. I grew up without a father and he died when I was quite young. I didn’t get along with my mom as well as I would have liked. My home life was not a happy one. There was a lot of fighting and a lot of arguments. I was teased in school. I was depressed. I felt like I was worthless. I don’t want to remember that. I don’t even want to acknowledge that it existed.

It did exist, unfortunately. I had good times though, growing up. I occasionally had fun with my brothers, sometimes at their expense. I learned a lot of things. I excelled in school. I discovered talents in myself. I became more confident. I had a family that loved me, despite their constant arguing.

As a grown up, there are also things I don’t want to acknowledge happened because of the bad times. I had a marriage that turned sour and there were bad times. I’ve had friendships with other people that turned sour. Sometimes I want to forget that these people were ever in my life, but why? I had good times with these people and I learned something from them.

My good times were still good, no matter who they were with. I still had fun with my ex at times and I still had good times with friends who are no longer my friends. Those moments aren’t really any less special because things turned sour between me and the person having them.

I still think about some of these things and smile or laugh. It’s a bit bittersweet because sometimes I wish one person or the other was still with me in whatever capacity that they were, but the logical me, looks at the situation and knows that our being apart, for whatever reason, is best for all involved.

The fact that I may have fallen out with somebody, doesn’t mean that they’re a bad person, well, not all bad. Sometimes people change and that person that he or she used to be isn’t the person they were anymore, or maybe you didn’t truly know them in the first place and they were never that person you thought they were. I think there are a lot of people in my life, who I don’t talk to these days, are still good people. I am going to miss the times I had with them. It makes me happy and a bit sad to think about something fun I did with them.

If someone gave me some magical potion and said, “You can erase one person from your memory,” I don’t know that I would do it. Sure, I would get rid of those bad and hurtful memories, but what about the good stuff? What about those happy memories? What about the times I laughed? What about the times I felt as if this person truly cared for me or was on my side? What about the compliments? Hey, compliments are still compliments, no matter who they’re from, even if it’s a back-handed compliment, take it like it’s chocolate and it’s your birthday.

I have actively sought to forget certain people, yes, multiple people, in my life, but maybe I should not. Maybe I should just remember them not for all the bad times, but for the good times I had with them and for the lessons I learned by being with them. Our paths may never cross again, but I’ll always have those good times to remember.